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He's great. But I hate having sex with him.
#1 Posted : Tuesday, March 13, 2012 5:00:33 PM(UTC)
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Joined: 10/20/2010(UTC)
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I've been with this guy for about half a year. He's a wonderful guy. All my friends like him, even my mother thinks he's amazing and they're all rooting for our relationship to last. There's just one problem: behind closed doors, he's terrible in bed.

I'm scared to even bring this up with him because I realise it's a sensitive subject for him. We only started having sex last month - after SIX MONTHS of dating. And it was really, really bad. I don't understand. I'm so attracted to him. He smells great, he is gorgeous, he's funny and charming and everything that I'm looking for in a guy. How could he be bad in bed? Why is it so hard to find someone who'll really fulfill me in all aspects - emotionally and physically?

I'm scared that if I stay with him, I'll start thinking of cheating (6 months and the C word has already come up. That can't be a good sign, right?). What if the sex doesn't improve? What if he can't keep it up for longer? I can't live with this frustration! I've tried telling him to slow down and to pleasure me in other ways, but it's always the same. He's inside me for, like, a minute, and then he's done and he turns over and falls asleep and I'm left lying there staring at the ceiling and wondering if it'll ever get better. Is it me? Am I the problem? What should I do? Break up? Or suggest counselling? How do I bring that up after only 6 months of dating? This is turning into a nightmare. Please help!
#2 Posted : Wednesday, March 14, 2012 10:30:48 AM(UTC)

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Joined: 4/19/2011(UTC)
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Hi, if he is young and inexperienced in the bedroom, it might be partially to blame for his lack of 'longevity', if not, premature ejaculation is a medical issue. maybe see someone in that regard but I think you should just talk to him, don't tell him you don't enjoy the sex , rather tell him you'd like to experiment a bit, (he seems seriously inexperienced) if a lack of four play is an issue, you have to ease him into it, guys are usually at your mercy in intimate situations, once you get him 'interested' you'd be able to get him to do whatever you want. make an effort of your own, perform oral sex on him, do this in the 69 position, if he isn't used to 4 play or either just not into it, you have to show him first hand how great it can be because, trust me, there is nothing more satisfying for a man than knowing he is satisfying his partner sexually...his conservative approach may be due to his upbringing or simply what he is used to, you can't expect him to pick up on your dissatisfaction if you don't tell him.

I'm in a very similar situation, and although my partner is very aware of my concerns, unfortunately sex isn't very high on her priority list.
#3 Posted : Tuesday, March 20, 2012 2:12:45 PM(UTC)
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Joined: 10/20/2010(UTC)
Posts: 113
Points: 339

He is most probably suffering from premature ejaculation. There is multiple reasons why men suffer from PE including, stress, anxiety or nerves or just to much sensation.

I would advise visiting the following online sexual health store http://www.alphamaleshop...mature-Ejaculation.aspx

Kind Regards
Malcolm Naidoo
#4 Posted : Wednesday, May 02, 2012 2:02:34 PM(UTC)
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Joined: 10/20/2010(UTC)
Posts: 113
Points: 339

Hi There,

Interesting situation you find yourself in. I have to say though, it is far more difficult finding a great guy than finding a guy great in bed.

My advice is, if he is a great as you say, HOLD ON TO HIM. It would be damaging to him to find out he is not good in bed, so one would have to be creative in bringing out such issues without making him feel bad.

A few things to note (from my limited experience):
*generally, if it is after a long time, he wouldn't last long - so if he is not interested in round 2, catch him the next day.
* if the issue is that after the first round, he falls asleep, catch him in the morning (or earlier than "late night"
* foreplay always helps... even a hand job and clean-up could help (then maybe shower - to freshen up) then try.

Keep trying girl.. don't let it frustrate you ... consider this your project.

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